So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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