Walk of Shame. In a state park.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Randomize
