Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Randomize
