i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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