RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
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