): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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