we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
