Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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