I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
Randomize
