then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
