Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Randomize