the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
