you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
