My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
