He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize