Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
Packed at 6 am completely wasted. Damage assessment: 12 pairs of socks (no underwear), a flashlight, 3 shorts, shot glass, 8 sweaters, puff paint, one sneaker.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize