3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Remember when you walked in on me sleeping INSIDE a pillowcase?
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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