I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
