My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Randomize
