It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
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