I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Randomize