I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
