I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I know where his drugs are but not my pants
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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