Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
