The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
