I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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