Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
