Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
