i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Believe it's possible to jerk off while watching the food network.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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