similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
