Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
