it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
