Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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