Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
