It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
