Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize
