when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
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