try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
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