after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I wish drunk me wasn't so into manscaping. Or at least good at it. Either or really
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Randomize
