I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
Randomize