if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Randomize
