"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
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