Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Casually had to file a missing persons report last night
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I mean it could have been worse, I could have been sober.
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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