whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
Randomize
