i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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