she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
About to go out with the girl of my dreams tonight. I am looking at one of her hottest fb pics, to practice not looking at her huge tits.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Well, I have a text in my phone that just says "Scrumtrelescent" from a girl I have in here as "Cheesy Tits", so you figure out how my night was going.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
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