You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
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