I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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