her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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