Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize